Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Getting my iPod serviced, Part V

When we left our heroes last time, DHL was in posession of my iPod, Apple has agreed to change the delivery address to my office, and my patience balance was in the red.

The "official" version states that 48 more hours must pass before the delivery status will change. To me it looks more like 576 hours, but who's counting. Details like that never bothered our heroes before. Besides, I need to get some work done, celebrate V-day, get drunk with friends (not in that order), so I take a break from the pursuit of happiness.

I check with DHL early morning. Raise your hand if you were surprised by what's to follow: nothing happened in the past 48 hours.

Just for kicks, I check out the Apple web site again. No fine print about any pickup policy, but it does say in black bits on white bytes that Apple will not change a delivery address once a package has shipped. Was the CRRep lying to me? Inconcievable.

Armed with false hope and singing the tunes of Life is Random, I decide to call Apple again. I pretend like nothing ever happend, and casually mention the iPod waiting for me at DHL, and immediately the friendly gal asks if I want to pick it up. "Sure, why not". She'll send a request right in, and it will only take 48 hours ...

Time for another "we tried it before, can we try something else now?", and suggesting that DHL be faxed instead. She puts me on hold, only to declare two minutes later that policy precludes faxing, but since I waited for 10 days (12, but who's counting?), they'll fax it this time.

I feel like the winner of the Alan Turing Award. I finally cracked the code and uncovered the mystery. The no-pickup policy is effective only during the first 9 days of customer annoynace.

She tells me to wait 15 minutes for the fax to arrive, I wait 30 and then call DHL:

me: I wanted to know if you received a fax authorizing a pickup for package ...?
dhl: let me check.
dhl: we have a package her for you waiting for pickup.
me: (ok, that wasn't an answer to my question, but it'll do for now)
dhl: you need to bring the two notices we left on your door.
me: (why would I bother to keep both notices for the same pacakge? never mind, I didn't even get one notice)
me: I haven't received any notices, you guys just called me.
dhl: (you can hear the gears clicking, steam rising) oh, in that case we need two IDs as proof.
me: will a driver license and credit card do?

On the way home I stop by DHL, hand the guy at the counter the tracking number, he goes to the back, then comes back again, can't remember if he wrote down 7 or 1. When he comes back with the package, the lady from Monday shows up, recognizes me and goes to the back just to make sure I did get the authorization this time around. Eventually I get the box that's been calling DHL home for the past 12 days.

All in all, it took 36 days from self-diagnosis to self-medication.

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